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Something I Forgot Along The Way

By ThinkingNo Comments

Throughout our life journey we travel a path that’s filled with learning. Here’s something I forgot along the way:

you-can-do-anything

As a child I had a lot of self-belief and the confidence to try new things. I don’t quite know when I lost belief in myself or the confidence to try; all I know is that I did. I didn’t write for a long time because of this lack of self-belief and confidence.

But I’ve re-learned this lesson and now my writing is going from strength to strength. I’m now writing short stories and doing some journalistic pieces. It just goes to show that all it takes is a little self-belief and the confidence to try and you can do anything.

Blog soon,

Antony



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Sunday 16 June 2013

Growing Up Gay: My Story

By Gay, History, Life4 Comments

Inspired by Born This Way: Real Stories of Growing Up Gay by Paul Vitagliano, I’ve decided to share my own story of growing up gay.

I’m about eight or nine in this photo, it’s Christmas and I’m striking a pose in my Power Rangers pyjamas proudly showing off my new cross puppet. I remember loving to entertain others, being full of confidence and having no inhibitions. I remember being sensitive, caring and sometimes in a world of my own. My mum describes me as a child by saying I was “such a joy to have.”

If you’d have shown me this photo as a teenager I’d have cringed with embarrassment. By my teen years I’d realised that I was different to others; I became very self-conscious of what my peers thought about me and was hiding my sexuality out of fear of what they’d think, say or do. I also became extremely self-critical of seemingly everything about myself.

Today, I look at this photo and aspire to be like that younger version of myself. I am so thankful that as a child my mum instilled me with confidence to be myself and always made me feel loved. I am still learning and developing as I experience life, but there are many goals I’ve been successful in achieving and the others I’m working towards.

If there are any gay youth who are experiencing what I did in my teens I would encourage them to stay true to who they are, only listen to the opinions of people who truly love you – they will love you for who you are, seek out support (Google: lgbt support) and come out when you’re ready.

I look at this photo and think: how did my family not know I was gay? The answer is that they did! I was born gay and I wouldn’t be any other way.

Published by: The Gay UK on Friday 8th August 2014.

Blog soon,

Antony

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I aim for posts on this blog to be informative, educational and entertaining. If you have found this post useful or enjoyable, please consider making a contribution by Paypal:


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Sunday 7 October 2012

Fear

By Thinking2 Comments

Following on from my last post Listening to my Heart through Mediation, I wanted to write about fear. I remember as a child I had confidence (albeit at little too much at times) to attempt anything, I had no fear of failure. It was one of the most precious gifts my mum had instilled me and my brothers. But since I’ve been listening to my heart I have felt more fear than ever before.

Perhaps it’s worried about more emotional trauma. Which is completely understandable. But recently I’ve had to go into situations that my fear has made me dredd beforehand, imaging what’s going to be said by people, how they will respond to me, etc. And you know what?

Facing my fear has been good. It’s never been as bad as I’ve imagined, in fact in some situations quite the opposite. So my advice to anyone feeling fear – think about how positive the situation could go (to give a balanced view), then go and face the situation – it’s never as bad as your fear makes out. And if it was, simply do what you have to do and then walk away.

Blog soon,

Antony

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Thursday 23 February 2012

Need to talk to you

By Friends & Family, Love & Relationships2 Comments

Text sent:
What are your plans for Saturday? 🙂

Text recieved:
Not sure but will discuss it when I call, need to talk to you

So I called the date who shall remain nameless. He said that he wanted to develop a friendship rather than a relationship. This is fine. We’d only seen each other a few times, so nothing was really invested. No risk, no gain, apparently. I like to stay friends with all those people I’ve dated (not that there’s been that many!), so that’s good.

He did invite me to the cinemas on Saturday, which we’d orignally intended to be our second date. So I declined. I explained that we needed to keep clear boundaries and maybe it wasn’t the best idea, but another time?

I thanked him for our date as I genunially enjoyed it. In reflection it also increased my confidence, just to know that someone was interested in me and it proved I was still able to attract the interest.

Write soon,

Antony

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Wednesday 21 October 2009
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