Photo Book: First 100 days together by Boyfriend-A
I arrived home from work today, checked my mail and found this. A surprise from Boyfriend-A. It’s a photo book, kind of like a diary documenting our whole relationship so far.
Inside the book is a series of visual representations of our first few months together in chronological order. Including: key dates, screenshots of messages we’ve exchanged, maps of places that we’ve been to together, photos of things we’ve done together (such as Manchester Museum, Lancashire Science Festival, Blackpool: Madame Tussauds & Sealife Centre, visiting Rivington and Liverpool Pride), photos of gifts we’ve got for one another, Facebook status updates, screenshots of some of my blog posts, screenshots from Skype, photos we’ve messaged one another on WhatsApp and it ends with a really romantic hand written message.
I had no idea that he was collecting memories, as I am, or that he’d do something as wonderful as this.
Both the photo book and surprising me with it were: Romantic. Awesome. Terrific. Clever. Original. OK, I’m going to stop now, otherwise I’ll run out adjectives.
I wont be showing the inside the book on the blog, as it’s far too personal and for our eyes only. Our first few months together have flown by. And do you know what? I cant wait for the next few months and beyond.
This photo book is one of the loveliest things a boyfriend has ever done for me. It’s amazing how someone relatively new in my life can mean so much to me.
I recently self-published The Good Teen, a modern-day telling of The Good Samaritan parable, with a hint of magic. I want to tell you a bit about my writing process for this short story.
The idea came from my childhood. Being brought up as a Christian we were told the The Good Samaritan parable. It’s a story that has stayed with me and one that I wanted to retell with my own twist. So I wrote/drew out the plot on flipchart (Left: My flipchart for The Good Teen, click on image for full size).
I like to develop my ideas, plots, sub-plots, settings, characters, pacing and description on flipchart as it’s faster than typing and allows me more creative freedom. The creative freedom to draw pictures, arrows and anything else I want to.
I banned myself from Facebook and Twitter for a week. I felt like social media was taking up too much of my time and that it was too accessible (being available on my phone, tablet, through the internet, etc.). I used the week to reevaluate my relationship with social media: how I use it, how often I use it and what I use it for. What I learned about myself, Facebook and Twitter was fascinating.
My Relationship with Social Media
The week off social media has caused me to realise a few things: 1. Facebook & Twitter are the main sites I visit on the web.
2. I hate incorrect information on the social media sites along with hateful comments/status’/groups. As an example, my friends were sharing a group called KGT (Kill Gays Today) on Facebook, with good intentions. They were sharing it to encourage people to report it, so that it would get banned. But having seen a few of these hateful groups shared recently, I honestly just don’t want to see another. Ever.
3. I check social media, while doing other things at the same time. This means that social media wasn’t taking up as much time as I thought – and – that giving them up didn’t give me a load of free time back.
4. Checking social media distracts me from activities were I need a high level of concentration, such as writing. So I did benefit for a whole week of not being distracted while writing.
5. I had to stop myself throughout the week from habitually checking Facebook & Twitter, which made me realise that I use them daily.
6. I found myself making excuses to myself to check them and then forcing myself not to, behaviours common with a developing addiction.
7. I found out that I do like seeing what people are up to without having to speak to them.
8. I love unique content people create and share on Facebook & Twitter, but sometimes I just wish there was more of it.
Facebook’s Sneaky Tricks
Facebook used sneaky tricks to try and make me go on it. First in a week it gave me 30+ notifications, all cleverly worded to make me feel like I was missing out. I had posted a status update saying I wouldn’t be on for the week; yet friends continued to message me, tag me, etc. This caused me to question how many of my friend’s actually see my status updates? I realised that I felt more identifiable on Facebook, so was more likely to be cautious about what I post/share on there.
Twitter’s Lack of Appeal
I have to admit that I barely noticed not using Twitter. I only received 3 notifications all week. My pet hates on Twitter are: the 140 character limit, the shameless self promotion by some, the lack of pictures/photos and the bad filtering of my home page feed. I actually realised I could live without Twitter in my life, if it wasn’t for the number of Publisher’s Publicists on there.
Giving up Facebook and Twitter has made me more aware of social media’s limitations and the temptation to overindulge. I love the unique content people make and share; so I shall be the change I want to see. Later on in the year I’ll be sharing/tweeting some of my short stories I’ve been writing, and continue to share my journalism articles with you all.
Some chat-up lines work and others really don’t. Here’s 5 chat-up lines you should NEVER Use:
5. You have 206 bones in your body. Want one more? It’s crude and it’s not even clever.
4. I’m calling the police because you stole my heart.
Really cheesy, to the point of being cringeworthy.
3. Are your pants a bit tight or are you just happy to see me?
Confidence is good, but cockiness (no pun intended) is not. The not-so-subtle subtext implies you’re just after one thing, which you probably wont get using this line.
2. You know what would look good on you? Me.
Nobody wants to go out with somebody who has a bigger ego than themselves. This line screams that they are egotistical.
1. Do you come here often?
This line is too ambiguous. Depending upon where you meet, this could have all sorts of subtext. I once had a guy say this to me in the waiting room of a sexual health clinic. I walked on by and thankfully never saw him again.
My advice would be to avoid the one-liners all together. Start the conversation with a simple ‘hi’ or ‘hey’ and stick to genuine complements.
What’s the worst chat-up line anybody has ever said to you? Leave a comment below.
Published by: The Gay UK on Tuesday 18th February 2014.
