I’ve been thinking a lot about romantic relationships recently.
Relationships can be complex. Having two (or more) individuals each with their own wants, needs and desires requires good communication to navigate the labyrinth of potential issues.
I am famously single, due to the fact I grew up around abusive relationships.
But here are some red flags that would make me run for the hills:
Manipulation – Getting you to think or feel a certain way. Particularly negative thoughts or feelings such as feeling inadequate, guilty, shame or fearful.
Any sort of Unjustified Blame.
Controlling behaviour – Getting you to act in a way that suits the other. This includes not allowing you to spend money or wear certain clothes.
Disrespect – Including put downs or insults.
Oppression – Preventing an individual from expressing opinions or views.
Any sort of abuse – Physical or verbal. Nobody has a right to abuse another.
Using Sex, Money or Anything Else to alter the power balance in an individual’s favour. This includes denial unless an individual complies with what the other wants.
A lack of anything positive – A relationship should help you to grow as a person and this requires support and positivity.
Alcohol or Drug use – Usually to mask historic trauma. The individual part taking in these behaviours needs to address the trauma and begin to heal
Isolating – You from family and friends.
Too Serious, Too Soon- Wanting to move in, get joint bank accounts, etc early on in the relationship.
I recently blogged about getting a Medtronic insulin pump. It has been life changing. I’ve gone from 33% of time in range to between 68% to 97% in range. Don’t believe me? Here’s the evidence, from a particularly good day:
As a result I’m less tired and in a better state of health.
The biggest adjustment has been remembering to take the pump with me when I roll over at night in bed. I have fallen asleep with the infusion set stretched, having forgot to take it with me. I have also woke up laid on top of the pump. Thankfully the insulin pump has been well designed and is very durable. Meaning it is difficult to damage. That said, I do try to take good care of it.
I’ve recently reduced the paperback prices of all my books, except one which I co-authored. These are the new prices:
I now only make a few pence in royalties per book sold. Why have I done this?
My hope is to reach more readers and that in the long term it will lead to more sales. I’ve already sold more books since the price reductions than I usually do in a month. However, time is yet to tell whether this risky strategy will be worth it financially.
But it is definitely worth it in terms of getting my books into more people’s hands. After all, why write books if hardly anyone reads them?
To any would be Authors out there, I’d say this: You’ll probably never get rich writing, unless you hit on a bestseller. But it is worth it, in terms of seeing your ideas come to life.
Write soon,
Antony
More Content From Antony
Here are the books that Antony has published, click any cover to learn more:
