I’ve really struggled with my mental health in the last few days. The days and evenings have all been tough. So here’s a video and photo update from Nick, Dylan & Russell, my Bengal cats:
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Nick says Hello, with the cutest meow ever. Video taken a couple of months ago.
A photo of each of them, taken yesterday:
Nick, my black Bengal kitten, he wouldn’t take his eyes off me, I think I was being stalked :P.
Dylan always seems grumpy, well when one looks at his face anyway. He looks like an eternal pessimist.
Russell with the big eyes. He knows how to use those eyes to make all that see him give him attention and fall in love with him.
Despite what people say about cats being independent and not really caring about their owners, apart from for food; my cats have been a great comfort to me. Indeed Dylan, the grumpiest looking one of the bunch seems to be able to sense I’m struggling. He comes over to check on me and rubs up against me. Not his usual behaviour. I think it’s his version of a hug and saying he cares.
Madonna recently performed at the Eurovision Song Contest. Here’s a video of her performance:
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Edit: 20/05/19, 08:45 – I had to change the video as the user had removed the original. There was a Vevo video, uploaded to Madonna’s official YouTube channel however it appeared to have been altered to make her performance sound better than it was during the original broadcast. So I went for this video that is more reflective of the original performance.
Madonna has had criticism since, with many calling it a disastrous and possibly career ending performance. People have described her voice as flat or off key, her outfit and the Christian heavy iconography controversial and unappealing.
I must admit that cringed watching it. But I realised something from it: We’re all human. Even Madonna.
We’ve all had times when things have gone disastrously wrong for us. I don’t know much about Madonna to be honest, but I once did see an interview where she described herself as a perfectionist. So I imagine that Madonna is currently in a mental state of self-denial, or one of rumination with her critical inner voice in over drive.
So here’s some mental health advice to Madonna, from my book Mental Health Wisdom:
Rumination is thinking the same thoughts or replaying memories again, again and again in your mind. Nothing good ever comes from it. It’s like having a song that you hate on full ear-bleeding volume and stuck on repeat. Rumination makes you feel like you are losing your mind.
When it comes to replaying memories, they are usually memories that are emotionally traumatic. Our memory of events is never accurate and always has a negative bias. What you need to remember if you find yourself ruminating is that the event has happened. It’s in the past. It’s gone. You can’t change what’s happened, no matter how many times you replay the video. It’s time to accept what’s happened, how it made you feel, so that you can let it go and move on.
Rumination is a waste of time, energy and effort. Rumination and the Critical Inner Voice go together. The critical inner voice is that voice inside your head that says things like:
You’re not good enough.
You don’t know what you’re doing.
Just who do you think you are?
You’re worthless.
You screw everything up. You are a screw up.
Nobody cares about you.
The critical inner voice is abusive and says things that we wouldn’t dream of saying to our worst enemy. It never says anything useful, nice, good or kind. It tends to get louder and louder if we allow it to. Managing the critical inner voice starts with the choice not to put up with the things it says to you.
I manage my critical inner voice in two main ways. First by imagining a volume control knob. I imagine it being turned down and hear the voice go quieter and quieter until it is silent. Second, I repeat positive affirmations that I know are true. I say things to myself like:
I am good at my job. I have a lot of specialist knowledge and thirteen years of clinical experience.
I offer a lot to people around me, including humour, compassion and kindness.
People value my opinion. I know this because I am often asked for it by others.
I am doing the best that I can and learn every day.
Having difficulty coming up with positive affirmations about yourself that are true? Ask people who are close to you: What is positive about me? What do you like about me? Others often see things that we don’t spot in ourselves.
This week I have had a brilliant time celebrating my 33rd Birthday. I’ve seen my brother Shaun for coffee, had tea out with mum and papa, seen Jayne for coffee and cake, spent a wonderful day at Mother Shipton’s Cave and in Knaresborough with Simon and am seeing Kay tomorrow. I received some lovely cards and great gifts. The most brilliant thing has been catching up with people.
But a highlight has to be visiting Mother Shipton’s Cave. Here are some photos from the cave visit:
Simon and I, the famous Petrifying Well behind us.
This is Beech Ave. It has some of the oldest beech trees in Britain.
The stream that leads down to the Petrifying Well.
The top of the Petrifying Well.
The Petrifying Well. Normally the rock above would have worn away due to erosion, but because of the unique properties of the water, that turns things to stone, a layer of stone has built up and protected the rock underneath.
A side view of the Petrifying Well (1).
A side view of the Petrifying Well (2).
Ivy at the side of the well has began to crystalise from the water splash back from the Petrifying Well.
The entrance to Mother Shipton’s Cave.
A rock carving impression of Mother Shipton within her cave.
The naturally formed Wishing Well (1). Simon and I both made a wish.
The naturally formed Wishing Well (2).
A sculpture of Mother Shipton in the small museum/gift shop.
Just a silly photo of me.
A video I took at the Petrifying Well:
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Essential Info
Mother Shipton’s Cave includes: some of the oldest beech trees in Britain, a cave where Mother Shipton (a Witch in the 17th Century) was said to have lived. A Petrifying Well that turns things into stone (due to the unique make up of the water), a naturally formed wishing well, a park for children (with picnic benches) and a small shop/museum. It is located in Knaresborough, North Yorkshire, England. This attraction could be fully completed in about an hour.
Admission Price: £9-10 for an adult. This is on the expensive side for what is on offer, however it does include an all day come and go wristband. This means that you could leave the attraction to go into the market town of Knaresborough.
Useful to know: Wednesday’s are market day in Knaresborough, so worth visiting on a Wednesday if you can. That way you can do the cave, markets and get something to eat in the many pubs/restaurants in the town.
I’ve had a fantastic birthday, but the week of annual leave that I’ve taken for my birthday has gone far too quickly as always.
Peters is a Consultant Psychiatrist, who is a Dean for undergraduate students at Sheffield University Medical School. He is also credited with helping athletes achieve success and has worked with: Sky Pro Cycling team, Olympic Gold medal winners and Liverpool Football Club.
The Chimp Paradox is not a new theory. Peters has taken an old theory and repackaged it, making it more accessible to more people. The theory goes that within our mind we have three aspects: the computer, the chimp and the human.
The computer stores autopilots (useful beliefs or behaviours), gremlins (destructive beliefs or behaviours that are removable/changeable in the computer) and goblins (destructive beliefs or behaviours that are difficult to remove/change).
All of these are based on past experiences. The computer also holds the values and beliefs that we live our lives by.
The chimp is the emotional part of your brain and is wired for survival and procreation. Whenever the chimp perceives a threat he will decide to fight, flight or freeze. The chimp can hijack you and is responsible for often irrational or destructive behaviours.
The human on the other hand is the logical and rational part of you. The problem comes that the chimp responds 5 times quicker than the human. So it is up to the human to learn to manage the chimp and to change the programming of the computer, so that all parts of the brain work towards the same goals without conflict.
Here’s a video that explains the concept:
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Anyone struggling with emotions, emotional intensity or regulation will find The Chimp Paradox useful. The book covers improving: day to day functioning, motivation, health, success and happiness.
Overall Peters should be commended for making the psychological theory more accessible. The Chimp Paradox is simple to understand and includes plenty of real life examples. The only downside to this is that Peters sometimes over explains the obvious.
If you’re into self-improvement, self-help or other similar topics, then you’ll enjoy The Chimp Paradox.
Are you a Doctor, Nurse, Healthcare Assistant or Other Healthcare Professional? Or a Student?
Ways The Human Body Can Go Wrong covers every system of the body, what can go wrong when the body malfunctions or fails, symptoms (including why these happen) and cures/treatments available.
It includes knowledge around essential skills for Clinical Excellence such as Assessment, All Age Observational Norms, Models of Care, Communication/Handover Tips, the role of Specialities, Medication Tips, Dealing with Errors, Documentation Advice and a list of Useful Resources.
It is written in plain English, but highlights important medical terminology. It has been written at a level where someone from a non-medical background can pick it up and learn, but that it is still valuable to those with significant Clinical Experience.
My dear friend Roy decided to follow in his family’s footsteps and enlist in the Royal Navy.
I wanted to maintain our friendship, to continue to support Roy, to make him laugh and to entertain him. So I came up with the idea of sending him a weekly email on random topics.
These emails were on a variety of topics, always being entertaining, sometimes being interesting, sometimes funny and occasionally being serious.
Topics included: Jokes, Puzzles, Inspirational Quotes, Future Technology to Be Excited About, How to Fight A Shark, How to Woo A Turtle, Some of the Most Amazing Jobs in the World, Facts About Castles, Do Aliens Exist?, The Kindest Humans, A List of Cakes, 13 Weird Body Facts, 20 Super Space Facts, Ancient Egyptian Curses, 10 Weird Olympic Games, The Great Emu War of 1932, Quiz: Flags of the World, Legendary Characters from the UK and others.
My Royal Navy Friend is a copy of these emails. In total, there are 52 emails. Dispersed throughout the book are also Royal Navy facts and stories.
This workbook has been designed for anyone that is struggling with alcohol or has struggled with alcohol in the past.
It is written in a Motivational Interviewing style, one of the key therapies used to support people with alcohol issues. It has been designed using a trauma-informed approach and is strength–based.
What you will find in this book is more than just worksheets about alcohol. You’ll find all the tools someone needs to get into recovery from alcohol and stay there. It’s a therapy-based book, not an alcohol-based book.
SpellCast is a comprehensive compendium of spells, oils, charms and talismans. It is purely a book about magic, folk magic for the 21st century. The spells are ones that are tried and tested, with some that will stand the test of time.
In SpellCast you will read about the power of Instant Magic, of Banishment & Bindings, Blessings, Cleansing, Communication, Death, Employment, Finance & Money, Fertility, Friendship, Happiness & Joy, Health, Love & Relationships, Luck Magic, Protection, Transformative Magic and WishCraft.
This book will change your life. Your life will be abundant in all meanings of the word.
This book contains everything that you need to know about mental health and mental illness. Mental Health Wisdom is divided into three sections.
Understanding is section one and is all about the facts of mental health.
In section two, Empathy Through Lived Experience, the author shares his personal experience of mental illness.
Life Hacks is section three. It’s all about self-care and quick and easy ways to improve your mental health, prevent mental illness or relapse of mental illness.
Mental Health Wisdom contains everything that you need to know about mental health and mental illness.
Mental Health Wisdom is divided into three sections.
Understanding is section one and is all about the facts of mental health.
In section two, Empathy Through Lived Experience, the author shares his personal experience of mental illness.
Life Hacks is section three. It’s all about self-care and quick and easy ways to improve your mental health, prevent mental illness or relapse of mental illness.
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