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sadness

Your Birthday

By Friends & Family, ThinkingNo Comments

It was your birthday yesterday. I always remember your birthday and the anniversary of your far too premature death. But some thing rather unusual happened to me yesterday. I felt the raw pain of grief in my heart at you not being physically there and had to stop to have a good cry. After my good cry, I lit a candle and wished you a Happy Birthday.

I have no idea why this particular birthday of yours brought such intense feelings of grief and loss. Perhaps I was more sensitive than normal due to lack of sleep. I’ve haven’t been sleeping well due to the constant pain from my nose.

At the weekend your family and friends are going for the annual meal to celebrate your birthday. This one will be a bit tougher than it normally is. But that’s okay. As much as I feel sadness and grief at your loss, I also smile and laugh remembering the good times together.

Big hugs,

Antony

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The Positive Side to Disappointment

By Life, ThinkingNo Comments
the-positive-side-to-disappointment-2018 Sometimes things in life don’t work out the way we’d like or expect them to. I’ve had one of these experiences recently and it led to me feeling disappointed. I wont go into what happened here, but will discuss what I learned from the experience.

Disappointment is a mix of emotions including sadness, rejection, frustration and anger. Feeling let down. Feeling like you have failed. None of these emotions or feelings are positive.

But if you take some time to think about it, there is a positive side to disappointment. Here are some positives:

  • Learning – You can learn a lot from the experience that caused you to feel disappointed. You can use this learning to help you navigate future similar events.
  • Stepping stone to future success – Anyone who is successful has often failed (and no doubt felt disappointment at the same time). But they have used past failures and disappointments as a stepping stone to future success.
  • Thing happen for a reason – I’m a big believer that things happen for a reason. Even if you don’t understand it at the time. Opportunities that I have failed to get in the past have nearly always turned out with me feeling grateful that I didn’t succeed in the first place.
  • An opportunity to take time out, reflect and re-plan – Feelings of disappointment take you out of your normal logical cognitive functioning. This can be an opportunity to take time out, reflect on choices made and change future plans.
  • Motivation – Feeling disappointed initially demotivates anyone. But once you get past this initial stage you can use it to motivate you and use it as springboard to future success.
  • To get perspective – Disappointment can be used to put things into perspective. Ask yourself: are you going to care about this in a year’s time? Is it life or death? Will it cause the world to end? Compare what’s important in your life and this disappointment to gain a more positive perspective.
  • Look at how well you did – Ask yourself: Could you have done anything more? Would it have changed the outcome? If the answer to both of these questions is no, then recognise that you did your very best. Make peace with yourself and accept this.
  • Other opportunities – Know that other opportunities are open to you. Yes, there is always the risk of failure and/or disappointment, but think of the benefits of these opportunities should you be successful. Now imagine how many of these opportunities would you have missed had you not been disappointed now. You might have an even better opportunity awaiting you around the corner.

Blog soon,

Antony

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Why a Petition to Stop Donald Trump from Making a State Visit Makes Me Feel Sad

By Political, Thinking2 Comments
Donald-Trump-No-State-Visit-To-UK-Image

Donald Trump

This blog post really isn’t about Donald Trump. I just wanted to make that clear in the opening line.

A petition to stop Donald Trump (the new President of the USA) from making a State Visit to the UK has been signed by 1.8+ million British citizens. This makes me feel really sad. Why? I’ll explain below.

First let me say that it’s great when people come together, stand together and become politically active.

But the reason for my sadness is that although 1.8+ million British citizens have come together on this issue, we don’t seem to be able to come together on other important issues.

Such as:

  • The increasing inequality in our society.
  • The funding and resourcing crisis in our NHS and Social Care Services.
  • The rising levels of homelessness.
  • The shocking year on year increase in people getting mentally ill.
  • The growing use of food banks.
  • Decreasing opportunities for young people.
  • Plans to scrap The Human Rights Act (1998).
  • The reduction of worker’s rights and protections.

We need to come together, stand together and become politically active in the same sort of numbers that have signed the petition, if not more, to fight for the changes that we would like to see in our society.

Blog soon,

Antony

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I aim for posts on this blog to be informative, educational and entertaining. If you have found this post useful or enjoyable, please consider making a contribution by Paypal:


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Today the World has Lost a Great Source of Laughter

By Gigs & Shows, Happiness & Joy, Inspiration, ThinkingNo Comments

victoria-wood-funny-image

Victoria Wood Funny Image (from: ‘An Audience with Victoria Wood,’ December 1998)

It is with great sadness that I write this blog post. Today Victoria Wood died, after a short battle with cancer at the age of just sixty two.

Victoria was an exceptionally funny Comedian, Actress and Writer. I feel that we have lost a great source of laughter in the world.

Victoria came from humble beginnings, being born and raised in Rochdale, Lancashire, in the North West of England. Victoria moved down to London to pursue her dream of becoming an Entertainer. In an interview with Victoria she once said that she always knew that she wanted to be a performer.

Victoria had much success and recognition in her career working in the mediums of stand-up comedy, sketches scene comedy, musical comedy and script writing. She has worked on TV, radio and theatre shows.

Through Victoria’s TV work she touched the hearts and resonated with millions of people across the country. This was likely because of her very down to earth and human approach to the audience. In Victoria’s shows she was always ahead of the times. All of her previous work is as relevant today as the day she wrote/performed it.

When Victoria first started out in mainstream comedy, all Comedians were male. It is said by some that Victoria led the way for other female Comedians – the likes of French & Saunders.

In Victoria’s personal life, she married young and has had two children. My thoughts are with her family. Victoria also disclosed and has talked openly about having depression.

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My Victoria Wood DVD Collection, along with other DVDs by female comedians.

For me Victoria was and is a constant source of laughter. Proper laugh-out-loud laughter.

Left is an image of my Victoria Wood DVDs. Some of them I have watched so often that I could repeat them to you word by word. Yet they still make me laugh. Victoria was a clever comedian that found the fun and humour in the often otherwise ordinary. I wish she had toured in the last few years, so I could have seen her live.

Victoria Wood is also a source of connection to my good friend Sye. We have often watched Victoria Wood DVDs together and laughed. The laughter helping to cement our friendship through our shared love of Victoria’s comedy and the shared experiences of watching together.

I heard the news of her death on the radio whilst driving home from work. My initial thought was one of disbelief.

I had to check several newspaper websites when I got home from work. Then I sat down in shock. Victoria has often worked with the same people throughout her career, many of whom were older than her. Yet she has died before them. Just goes to show, you never know how much time you have on this planet.

My third feeling and the one that’s stayed is a feeling of sadness. Think of how much unfinished ideas and creative works she wasn’t able to complete. Think of the new jokes and tales of laughter she was planning on sharing. Very sad.

Write soon,

Antony

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