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Unsafe Places to be a Gay Man

By Gay, ThinkingNo Comments

Imagine living with a secret that could get you killed. Imagine the lengths you would have to go to to keep this secret. Imagine growing up being told that people like you are unnatural and immoral. In these circumstances how would you cope? How would you protect your mental and emotional health?

What I’ve just described is the life of some gay men in some places. They aren’t able to choose who they love. They face being disowned by their family and friends, assaults, criminal prosecution and potentially even being sentenced to death. Just because of who they are and who they are attracted to/fall in love with.

In the UK, gay men have equal rights in law and attitudes are becoming more positive towards gay men. But this wasn’t always the case.

Just fifty years ago, being gay was illegal in the UK. Gay men weren’t out, they couldn’t marry their male partners, couldn’t adopt children as a gay couple and couldn’t give blood.

If fifty years ago a gay man had come out and told people of their sexuality they would face legal consequences (such as being locked up in a mental hospital or worse chemical castration). They would face being disowned by their community (if not driven out of it), become the repeated victim of crime, experience unsympathetic and homophobic Police, experience discrimination when buying goods or accessing services, be unable to get employment and many other negative consequences. All because they’d been honest about who they are and who they are romantically attracted to.

Given this history of prejudice and discrimination (both on individual and institutional levels), it’s not surprising that coming out is a big event for gay men. Gay men who do come out show emotional vulnerability, driven by a desire for loved ones to fully know them and a hope that they will accept them for who they are. It explains why some people gay men will never come out and take the secret of who they are to their grave.

It also explains why gay men often have mental health issues (including being at greater risk of suicide), low self-esteem, problems with addiction (self-medicating difficult emotions such as shame or fear) and generally worse health outcomes than heterosexual people. There’s a lot of shame, self-loathing and unhappiness in the gay community. It is currently getting better in the UK, with younger generations of gay men experiencing these issues to a lesser extent.

But around the world there are many places where it is extremely unsafe to be a gay man. Where gay men still have to hide who they are. I think it’s really sad that gay men have only got equal rights in some countries, but not others.

Here are some countries where it is unsafe to be a gay man and what the legal consequences could be for coming out. An out gay man in any of these countries would likely experience the same prejudice and discrimination that an out gay man would have experienced in the UK fifty years ago. This is by no means an exhaustive list. Just some of the main countries I found out about whilst doing research for this blog post.

CountryLegal Consequences
EgyptUp to 17 years in prison, with or without hard labour.
MoroccoUp to 6 years in prison, with hard labour.
Tunisia3 years in prison.
Ghana3 years in prison.
NigeriaUp to 14 years in prison. They have the death penalty in some parts, but it is apparently not used.
KenyaUp to 14 years in prison.
Saudi ArabiaVery barbaric. Death penalty, or prison. Fines and floggings.
United Arab EmiratesPrison time. Minimum 6 months, but no upper maximum amount of time (up to the Courts).
Bangladesh10 years to life prison sentence.
MaldivesUp to 8 years in prison.
Pakistan2 years to life in prison.
Sri LankaUp to 10 years in prison, plus fines.
Malaysia20 years in prison.

What struck me after I compiled the list above, is that for some people, their holiday destination might be listed. I wonder if the people going on holiday to these places realise how they treat gay men there? Just a thought.

If you enjoyed this blog post, you might enjoy my Influential UK Gay Men article which is available as a free download here.

Write soon,

Antony

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Sunday 24 August 2025

Why I Think The Conservatives Won the General Election

By Political2 Comments

I’m a Labour Party supporter. So I was obviously disappointed with the General Election result. But I like to understand the why? Why did so many people vote for The Conservative Party, when it feels like Turkeys voting for Christmas? Here are some of the reasons I think The Conservatives won the General Election:

  • A lack of political education in schools. Especially political history.
  • Brexit – The Conservatives reached hard core Brexiteers by clearly promising the leave the EU. It doesn’t seem to matter that it’s a promise they won’t be able to keep. Labour weren’t initially clear on their plans for Brexit.
  • The all-powerful right wing media. If you read, hear or see something enough you’ll begin to believe it. The was a horrendous campaign of lies and misinformation about Jeremy Corbyn and The Labour Party. Every outlet, including the BBC failed to give a balanced view or hold the Conservatives to account.
  • Traditional Labour voters opted for other parties such as the National Scottish Party, The Green Party and Independents. Therefore diluting Labour’s vote share.
  • Businesses thought only of profit, putting their confidence in the Conservatives. This is likely because of the business-friendly policies of The Conservatives such as lowering corporation tax. Whereas Labour wanted to increase the tax rate for top earners to pay for some of their investment plans. This is capitalism at its worst and is driven by greed.
  • Acceptance of reality as it is and that it can’t be changed. No matter how miserable reality is. This is driven by a fear of change.
  • Older people tend to vote and tend to vote Conservative.
  • The bad weather on the day; the cold, wet and darkness probably put some people off going out to vote. It’s sad but it’s true.

What are your thoughts on why The Conservatives won the election? What do you worry about now? Leave a comment below to let me know.

Write soon,

Antony

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Saturday 14 December 2019

The General Election Result – In Images

By PoliticalNo Comments

This will be my last political blog post for a while. Here are my thoughts about The General Election result in images:

What we got:
hung-parliament-2017

What we got: A Hung Parliament.

What I hoped for:
welcome-to-government-labour-2017

What I hoped for: a Labour Government.

What I fear:
5-disastrous-years-ahead-conservatives-2017

What I fear: 5 Disastrous Years Ahead.

Blog Nonpolitically soon,

Antony

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Sunday 11 June 2017

Book Review: Misery by Stephen King

By Amazon, Books & Authors, ReviewsNo Comments
misery-stephen-king-book-cover Misery by Stephen King is compelling, creepy and will have the reader on the edge of their seat with anxiety and fear.

In Misery Author Paul Sheldon has a dreadful car accident. When he finally wakes up, he finds himself in the guest bedroom of Annie Wilkes.

Annie Wilkes is a psychopath and Paul’s number one fan. She has dragged him from the wreckage, set and splintered his mangled legs. Paul is in an incredible amount of pain and knows that he should be in hospital. Anne Wilkes used to be a Nurse has a stash of painkillers.

Annie is reading Paul’s latest book. Paul’s bestselling books about Misery Chastain have made him a lot of money, but he hates writing them despite their popularity. He see’s the Misery Chastain books as making the money he needs to live, so that he can get on with some real writing. So in this latest book Paul has done something drastic: he has killed Misery Chastain.

Annie doesn’t know about Misery’s death yet, but when she does she calls Paul a dirty bird and demands another Misery book, just for her, called Misery’s Return. And she won’t take no for an answer.

Nobody knows that Paul is at Annie’s remote mountain home. It will be months before the snow melts to allow Paul’s wreck of a car to be found. And meanwhile Annie makes it clear that she is prepared to make him suffer, severely, if he doesn’t cooperate. Paul does the only thing he can: write as if his life depends upon it (which it actually does).

The idea behind Misery is brilliant, clever and excellently expressed through King’s writing. He has turned Misery into a horror classic, with some traumatic scenes that will stay with the reader for a long time after they’ve finished the book. So people with a sensitive disposition be aware.

Misery is told in the first person perspective of Paul, meaning that there is an awful lot of internal monologue, especially at the beginning where Paul is bedbound. The description of pain from Paul’s perspective does lack variety and begin to feel a bit repetitive. The plot is fast-paced, full of tension and has plenty of hooks to make the reader be compelled to read on.

I read Misery in about a week, often staying up far later than I intended to, to find out what happens next.

Misery is gripping and a must read. Misery is available to buy on Amazon and at all good book shops.

Review soon,

Antony

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Sunday 1 January 2017
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