I was about twelve years old when mum told me and my brother Alex (see My Darling Baby Brother) that we had two brothers. My biological dad had a relationship with a woman before he met my mum and the results were two sons. Mum said that she didn’t know where they were or even what their names were. So that was that, we continued on with our lives – not really asking any questions.
Then several months ago mum was on a train. She noticed a ticket inspector and thought she recognised him. She looked at his name badge and her mind swirled like a tornado as she realised it could be one of these brothers. Her hands shook and from somewhere came a compulsion, she simply needed to speak to him. She needed to ask him who his biological father was. She asked him and she was right. He was one of the sons from my biological fathers first relationship. Mum showed him photos of Alex and me and took his number.
What followed was a series of texts between mum and this long lost brother, Shaun. A meet up was organised with the two brothers and mum, Alex and me. Mum and Alex couldn’t wait whereas I was a little guarded. Still my gut was telling me I should go, so I did. On the day Shaun and his partner turned up. The other brother didn’t turn up, he wasn’t ready to meet us, and that’s cool. Meeting Shaun on that day has been the best thing I have ever done!
I’ve gained a big brother, who is fantastic. He makes me laugh and we’ve connected talking about everything and anything. Ha ha, he’s even protective of me wanting to have words with a guy who made some homophobic comment towards me, he didn’t need too though – I have a very sharp tongue! But more than that I’ve also gained a sister-in-law to be who I absolutely adore and three amazing kids.
I’m glad Alex was able to meet them before his death, it’s just such a shame we didn’t come across them sooner. I’m sure on that fateful day on the train, someone was leading mum to Shaun so that we could all meet. Especially for Alex who had limited time left in the physical world. I’m a big believer in everything happens for a reason.
It’s not the blood that makes us family to me, it’s the relationship we have with one another. I feel so lucky and blessed to have met him and his wonderful family. I love that we meet up when ever we can, have good times together that are spent laughing and of course enjoy a drink together.
Write soon,
Antony
