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Chippy Tea

By Gay, Life, ThinkingOne Comment

I headed to a local chippy tonight in search of tea. I had previously tried this chippy once and found the owner friendly and the food good (hence why it has become my new faviourate place to get chippy tea!).

I was walking towards the entrance were a tall, slim guy stood smoking. He had spider long legs and long blonde hair held back with a hair band. He was wearing light blue jeans, a camp blue vest and prada sun glasses covered his eyes.

He entered the chippy before I did and continued a conversation with the owner and his rough-looking friend. As he spoke I noticed that he had a London accent. He talked with the owner about fashion and music. His friend (the rough-looking one) asked the owner for his last name. I managed to gather that the owner had lived and had family in London. The rough-looking guy asked to borrow camp guy’s phone in order to call someone down in London to see if they knew of the chip shop owner.

I overheard camp guy saying to the chip shop owner “We are going to be followed by Living TV. It should be on in June.”.

I was smiling, happily enjoying listening to the conversation. Nice to see such a camp guy in the hetrosexual world we live in (particularly in the homophobic area I currently live in). Another of his friends came in (again rough-looking) stated that he had been ID-ed in the shop. I couldn’t help myself and became involved in the conversation saying: “You should take it as a complement, I do. I don’t get asked anymore”
To which the camp guy replied:
“Tell me about it….you get past 20 and then you never get ID-ed.”

Their food was nearly ready and mine was on it’s way. I observed that this camp guy had such confidence in his aura and charisma in his personality, almost like a celebrity. The rough-looking guy confirmed to the owner that the person on the other end of the phone knew his family.

They took their food. Camp guy looked over to the owner and said “see you later”. He made eye contact with me (or I assume he did – because I couldn’t see his eyes with his sun glasses on), touched my arm briefly and repeated the same sentance again. I replied: “Yeah, see ya.”

Once they had left (camp guy and the two rough-looking friends) I quized the owner about them. Apparently they are a band, perhaps a tribute band (not that they looked like any band I had ever seen). He said that their manager is up here and that one of the members of the band is from up here.

So there we go, what an odd experience eh?

Driving home afterwards thinking about what I had just experienced. I was impressed by his confidence and charisma (something maybe I’ve lost? But maybe will get back after I’ve moved?). His confidence to be himself in such an oppressive area and to hold his own in conversation knowledgeable and experienced on a variety of topics (or at least that’s the impression he gave).

So even though I don’t have living TV, I must check the website in June to see if it’s for real!

Write soon (probably after the up-coming move!),

Antony

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Tuesday 21 April 2009

It’s all in their hands

By Friends & Family, Life, Money / Finances, Thinking2 Comments

Hello Readers!

I am fustrated today as everything in relation to the apartment is in their hands. So who’s them? The house builder, the financial advisor, the bank, etc.

There is nothing more I can do at present and no way to speed the process up. I want to move as ASAP (see Not a Happy), but it looks as if there are going to be a few delays. This is why I am sooo fustrated. I guess I’ll get there, just things aren’t as straight forward as I thought they’d be.

On a positive note on Monday my Mum, Sandra (offical title my Step Nan) and I went watching Tina Turner (photos and a few clips to come soon promise).

With regards to David, he has adjusted to the inital shock that I as he puts it will soon “be a home owner”. I tell him off when he says this – I sometimes don’t feel grown-up enough to own my own home. Besides which the bank will technically own it for the first 35 years, so it will just be like renting (apart from I get to keep the place when I’m old(er)).

I’ll keep you all updated and promise to get the Tina Turner stuff online when I get a spare second.

My Love to All,

Antony x

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Friday 3 April 2009

Not a Happy Bunny

By Life, Thinking2 Comments

I am not a happy bunny tonight. And here’s why:

1. Being broke. Quite some time ago I posted about my debts (see Financial Blues). And even though I increased my payments and I have paid off over £3, 000, I feel broke & like I’m getting no where. I earn more than I have ever in my life, yet feel more broke than I have in my life.

My solution to this problem: I have bought a lotto ticket and three euro millions tickets. I usually buy ONE ticket when I feel a little broke (the week before payday for example), so you can imagine how broke I actually feel!

2. House. This is not my home. It is a house I share with house mates.

  • And it is a trashed by house mates. I tidy and it gets trashed again.
  • The walls are paper thin. I can hear house mates phone conversations, music playing, weeing, sneazing, snoring, etc.
  • There isn’t enough space. I basically live in one room (my bedroom) which is the biggest room in the house. Yet it is tiny because of the amount of stuff I have got that fill the space and make it cramped. Nothing has a place and is just stuffed were ever it will fit.

    • This is as far away from my ideal home as possible.

    My solution to this problem: I will move out. Apart from I can’t afford it because of point 1. Am I stuck in a rutt?

    3. Tired. I am very tired. I am exhaused and this probably makes the other things see worse than they are or maybe not. Maybe they are exactually as bad as I feel they are right now.

    Anyway, now that I’ve told you my woes I am off to bed.

    Night, Night,

    Antony

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    Thursday 5 March 2009

    What makes a relationship work?

    By Life, Love & Relationships, Thinking2 Comments

    Hi All,

    Missed me? I’ve been away at David’s for the first whole week ever. He doesn’t have the internet, hense no opportunity to blog. The week reminded me what I have learn’t about What makes a relationship work from past relationships as well as the present one with David. So here’s what I’ve learn’t:

    Expectations
    In order to make a relationship work you must know what you want out of it. Your expectations. Many relationship experts recommend if your single you make a list, so you know what your looking for. What these relationship experts often for get to tell you is that you also need to find out what your partner expects out of the relationship too. There’s two people in a relationship you know!

    Issues
    First you need to recognise your internal issues and then you need to start to deal with them. Whether it’s letting go of the past or dealing with your insecurities you need to deal with the psychological baggage we pick up as we go through life. One of the issues that many people have is confidence.

    You must have confidence in yourself and who you are as a person. Someone once said to me: How can you expect anyone to love you if you don’t love yourself? Confidence is a difficult thing to quantify but you know if you have it or not in a relationship. It is also equally difficult to build confidence, but it is doable.

    Your partner will also have some of the psychological baggage or ‘issues’ that we all pick up in life. You can help by discussing both of your issues together and dealing with them together.

    Communication
    Communication that clear and honest is vital in any relationship. David and I have had a few arguements (see Job Interview & David and A mad week!) and they are always to do with unclear communication.

    A recent example of unclear communication between David and I was the Monday (the 2nd night staying at his apartment). He was tired and had to wait for me to get in. I had forgot to mention to him that I was going to a friend’s and when I did I didn’t let him know when I would be home.

    Result: an arguement. My issue getting my level of independance right (one of my ‘issues’) and his the lack of clear communication.

    A Mental and Physical Connection
    A mental connection also called companionship or friendship. Many people say “my partner is my best friend.” Now whereas I probably wouldn’t say they should be your best friend (as it would make you too reliant on them), they should come close. Mutal interests aid this mental connection. As does sharing the same personality characteristics (such as both playful, serious, artistic, etc.).

    A physical connection, passion is also vital. You must fancy them, as much as they fancy you. Couples are strange. Some spend the whole ‘honeymood period’ in bed whereas other couples physical connection enhances as time goes by and they get comfortable with one another.

    All couples will have their own way this area of their relationship develops. Your fine as long as it continually developing and not becoming routine or worse none exisistant. If this happens there are plenty of books that will give you advice on how to spice up the bedroom department.

    Trust
    I have seen many relationships break down due to a lack of trust between and in one another. Trust is a odd thing, it is a feeling of utter secure-ness. Like a duvet rapped tightly around yourself making you feel all warm, snug and secure. One of the wonderful things about being in a relationship with David is that I trust him 100%. In addition to this, the duvet feeling he immitates when he hugs me tightly in bed.

    A Sense of Humour
    For me one of the most wonderful thing is laughter. Laughter to me is the verbalised form of happiness. So a relationship with humour is a relationship with happiness. We all have essentially a sense of humour but sometimes we keep it locked inside. So every now and again, release it and let it out to play!

    Individuality & Independance
    Getting the right balance of individuality and independance is important. And definitately (from my own experience) not easy. Individuality is about remaining who you are. You are bound to pick up character traits, sayings and little ways off your partner but it is essential that you are you. Your partner fell for you, not for a clone of themselves.

    Independance is about doing your own thing. This is benefical in as it gives you space and allows you not to become dependant on your significant other. Both you and your partner need your space in order to continue to grow and develop as individuals and neither of you wants to be completely dependant up on the other.

    Rituals
    I’m not talking pagan here (see Pagan Festivals). Rituals are little routines that you and your partner do together. Whether it’s Wednesday night take away night or staying in bed till late Sunday these routines allow you spend quality time together and bring your closer together.

    Support
    We all need support at times, whether we like to admit it or not. There will be hard times when you need support in a variety of senses: beit emotional stress, financial stress, ill health, etc. You need to realise when your partner needs support and he does you (this is made much easier with open, honest, clear communication).

    Support can be offered in many ways. Being a sounding board for him, practical support (shopping for him during a stressful move), but even just being there with a calm stress-free energy can help.

    So…
    So this is what I’ve learn’t. I hope it is useful for your relationship. And if your single – I hope it helps you when you meet someone.

    Blog soon,

    Antony



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    Monday 23 February 2009
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