Recently I read a very honest post on Mike’s blog titled Glass half… It got me thinking about how difficult it can be to be completely honest my with myself. I’m sure you’ve all had the same difficulty at times.
Then this weekend my good friend Sye came round to visit. Sye and I have a rather unique relationship – we can tell each other anything (and I mean anything). We had a long chat about different things going on in our lives going in to the early hours of the morning. I won’t go into the detail of the conversation as it’s private and unimportant, but what is important is what I’ve realised: I’m not always being completely honest with myself. I do a fantastic job of avoiding the issues that I have and distracting myself with other things.
This avoidance of these issues has led to them seeping in to my everyday life with out me even realising. Look at my blog for example, when’s the last time I wrote a personal post? In the last few months it’s been review after review, books, TV anything to avoid writing from the heart. Well that’s going to be the first change. I’m still going to write reviews (as I quite enjoy it), but the most recent personal post will be a sticky. This means the most recent personal post will appear as the first blog post on the home page. If you like reading the reviews remember to check further down the page for the most recent review. Oh and I know I’m a few Torchwood episodes behind, but I do intend to catch up.
So first completely honest point – I am struggling to decide what are my own feelings and those of others. In paganism and indeed most spiritualities there is a belief that everyone and everything are interconnected. The theory goes that we are all connected and that if enough people feel negative it spreads making more people feel negative. Have you ever been to see a friend feeling really happy but they are down in the dumps and you leave them feeling down yourself? It’s kind of like that but on a much larger scale. We are constantly being bombarded with negativity, more so than ever before, just think: bankers, corrupt politicians, the economic climate (and all that it brings – lack of job security, etc.), the list could go on.
So that’s my first challenge to decide how I feel about everything in my life. To sort through things in my head and listen to what my heart says. From there I can decide what and how I am going to change the things in my life that need changing.
Write soon,
Antony
