grandma

All About Stories: What, How, Why, Power, Where, Who, Jobs, My Stories & Useful Websites

Reading Time: 7 minutes

I was very young when I was introduced to stories.

My mum would read me stories out of books at bedtime. Books like The Magic Faraway Tree & The Wishing-Chair Again.

I have fond memories of sitting on my grandma’s lap, her telling me stories about Freddie the Frog. She would do the different voices of the characters and even sound effects. I remember my grandma bouncing me up and down on her knees often, making the noise of an ambulance.

As I grew, so did my experience of stories. I was shown or told many different stories, in many different ways, about many different things, by many different people. Some stories would be fiction, whereas others would be non-fiction.

As an adult, I’ve gone to to present some of my own stories or re-tell stories I know to others. I’ve done this through my books, blog posts, articles and short stories.

Yet, I’ve never really considered, explored or examined stories as a concept. Which is why I’ve written this post.

What Are Stories?

According to the Cambridge Dictionary, a story (singular of stories) is:

Story word definition from Cambridge Dictionary.

How Are Stories Presented?

Stories can be shown, told or presented to others in a variety of different ways including:

  • Oral/verbal telling – either live or pre-recorded. This was the first way of sharing stories and came when humans first developed language, well before the written word.
  • Through works of art – paintings, tapestries, sculptures, etc.
  • Written words – Both in print and electronic. This can be books, pamphlets, ebooks, websites, emails, messages, etc.
  • Images – photography or other still images.
  • GIFs – Short animated files that have a repeating movement, sound or both.
  • Songs/music/sound. This could include songs with words, music (with or without words) and sounds or sound effects.
  • Body movements/gestures/language. Such as dance routines or playing charades.
  • Video – TV, films, etc.
  • Rituals, which may involve the making and consumption of food.
  • Plays/other performances – where the story might be scripted or improvised.
  • 3D cinema experiences.
  • Some theme park rides.
  • Through sense of smell.
  • Computer games – many have stories that the player experiences as they play the different levels/missions within the game.

Why Stories?

Stories can have many purposes and many potential benefits including:

  • Knowledge – helps people to remember information in a meaningful way. This is required for them to share this information with others.
  • Can be used to teach others.
  • Helps to create connection between people.
  • Helps to create empathy between people.
  • Helps people to consider new ideas.
  • Helps people to experience new or different emotions.
  • Helps people to express their thoughts, ideas and emotions to others.
  • Entertains people.
  • Helps develop imagination/imaginative play and can stimulate creativity.
  • Develops problem solving skills.
  • Helps people remember historic events, both good and bad, and the lessons from these events.
  • Can help people to know their own story and share it with others.
  • A way of sharing beliefs, values and cultural practices.
  • Helps people to explore a range of concepts such as morals, values, beliefs, identify, etc.
  • Can be used to process and heal from traumatic experiences.
  • A way of safely sharing life experiences, without the other people having to directly experience the event(s) for themselves.
  • A way to test someone’s cognitive functioning.
  • Can improve vocabulary, concentration and listening.
  • Can be used to influence others.
  • Can be used to earn money for people to live on.
  • Can provide a world for people to escape to when they have a difficult reality. Other words for this could be distraction or disassociation.
  • Can help people feel less alone and isolated.
  • Can give people hope for their future.
  • Can help to reduce anxiety, stress and tension.
  • Can improve relationships within communities.
  • Can improve confidence and self-esteem.

The Power of Stories

Stories can have great power, sometimes being transformational to those that experience them. But the impact of stories varies greatly depending on a wide range of factors. This makes it practically impossible for storytellers to predict who, how or even if their story will have any impact on others.

Let me give you a few examples of stories and how they have impacted me to demonstrate what I mean:

Impact on Me

Made me admire Ruth Cocker Burks greatly. Made my share her story on my blog. Made me buy her book.

Made me admire Ida & Louise Cook greatly. Made me feel better about the world during World War 2. That there were some good people out there and that the history wasn’t just genocide/death.

Made me feel deeply sad for Matthew Shepard, his mother and his family. Made me imagine what his torture must have been like. Reminded me, that as a gay man, I have to be hypervigilant for danger. The world is not always a safe place for gay people. Told Matthew’s story on my blog, at a time when America seems to be going backwards.

Gave me hope that there are some really smart people out there who are motivated by the greater good/good for humanity rather than money and greed. This story gives me hope that diseases that are currently un-curable, might one day be cured.

Where Are Stories Shared?

As well as stories being presented in different ways, they can also be shared in different places, including:

  • Traditional media – newspapers, TV, radio.
  • Social media – all platforms.
  • On messaging apps or via telephone.
  • On other apps, such as ones for audiobooks.
  • Websites – including Amazon, YouTube, Netflix, etc.
  • At specific events, both work-related and social.
  • In any community settings where two or more people can gather – coffee shops, supermarkets, libraries, community centres, pubs, etc.
  • Within workplaces.
  • Cinemas.
  • At theatres, clubs and stadiums.
  • At gyms, sport/leisure centres.
  • On public transport.
  • In a car.
  • Practically any where and at any time, depending on how the story is being presented.

Who Can Present Stories?

Technically anyone can present stories to others. Providing that the others want to experience the story and are able to access it in the way that it is being presented.

However, we do tend to prefer stories from people and organisations that we feel we can trust.

When a storyteller wants to share a story with you, useful questions to ask yourself are:

  1. What is the storytellers agenda?
  2. Are they a biased?
  3. How much do I trust them?
  4. What are their credentials? (i.e. qualifications and experience related to the story).
  5. If the story is non-fiction, will they be giving you the correct facts/information?
  6. What is my past experience with this storyteller?
  7. What is your gut feeling telling you about the storyteller and the story they are presenting?

Storytelling Jobs

There are who industries set up around storytelling, think for example: any company providing the news, any company that does public relations, marketing or advertising.

But some more interesting storytelling jobs include: TV/Film Director, Comedian, Writer/Author and Actor/Actress.

Some of My Stories

Here are just a few of my stories:

Finding Your Happiness is my story of how I discovered the knowledge, skills and practices to be happier. How I became the happiest that I have ever been.

I published this book to share the knowledge, skills and practices, because I believe that everybody deserves to be happy.

As an experienced Registered Nurse, I am aware of the many Ways The Human Body Can Go Wrong. So I’ve written this book to share stories with Doctors, medical students, Nurses and Student Nurses about how the human body xan go wrong and what treatments are available.

As a gay man, I wanted to share a list of Influential UK Gay Men, which I did in this FREE article, because have role models with influence really counts.

Useful Websites

Write soon,

Antony

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My November

Reading Time: 3 minutes

A lot happened in November. Some of it was good and some of it was bad. Here were the key events:

4th November 17 – I went Smoke-Free, Day 1.

Smoke-free-logo

5th November 17 – I was given the cold shoulder by Dylan. He just walked away from attention to sit with his back towards me. I called him by his name and was ignored.

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Blanked by Dylan.

6th November 17 – My week made with the arrival of my pre-orders from Amazon.

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My Pre-orders: Despicable Me 3 and Monster by Michael Grant.

11th November 17 – I tried on silly Christmas hats!

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Silly Christmas Hats!

12th November 17 – My lovely Grandma passed away. I am sure she is missed dearly by all who knew her. I am also very lucky to have some wonderful memories with her.

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My Lovely Grandma.

14th November 17 – I went to the GP about an abscess in my groin. I was given oral antibiotics and told if it gets any bigger I must go to A&E to see a Surgeon.

15th November 17 – The abscess had doubled in size. So went to A&E, was given a dose of IV antibiotics and eventually saw a Surgeon. They decided to operate first thing the following morning.

I had been Nil By Mouth since arriving in A&E at around 1PM and had not eaten since breakfast. They let me go home well after 9pm to eat, rest and with instructions to fast from 3am and be back at the hospital for 8am.

my-november-2017-4
Oh pink…just my colour.

16th November 17 – The day of the surgery. All of the NHS staff were kind, compassionate and understanding. But communication could have been better.

I arrived on the ward at 07:50am and was instructed by a Nurse on the night shift to wait in the waiting room, while the early staff had handover. The night shift Nurse didn’t tell the day staff that I had arrived and meant I ended up waiting over an hour. Apparently staff had been looking for me everywhere.

After the surgery, I didn’t know whether my open wound had been packed or not, because it wasn’t documented in my notes.

It has been uncomfortable, a bit tender and at times painful. I have thanked my family and Steve who have been amazing in supporting me pre and post surgery.

The surgery and waiting for the open to heal has been very frustrating for me.

Everything has had to be put on hold. I’ve had to rest and haven’t been able to do very much apart from watching Netflix, reading and napping. A huge positive is that I have remained Smoke-Free throughout.

17th November 17 – I became super excited after watching a video clip that revealed the title of the new Fantastic Beasts (Harry Potter) film: The Crimes of Grindelwald on Twitter @BeastsMovieUK. The film will be released on 16.11.18.

22nd November 17 – The day of Grandma’s funeral, which was really a celebration of her life. The service was touching and well attended. Grandma’s family and friends came together afterwards to share memories and the many things they will miss about her.

25th November 17 – Day 21 of being Smoke-Free.

Smoke-free-logo

29th November 17 – Last day working at my old job. I will miss the people and liked the work, but am excited to start my new job.

Write soon,

Antony

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What’s New: Things, Candle Creation, Support & Medication

Reading Time: 5 minutes

What’s new? Lots. In this blog post I’ll be telling you all about new things I’ve bought (or been treated to by others), my latest batch of homemade and handmade candles, my experience of using Bipolar UK’s eCommunity, attending my local Bipolar Support Group and dealing with a change to my medication.

Things

I’ve got quite a number of new things recently. I saved up and bought-in-bulk the following Dorothy Morrison candles and oils from The Angry Cauldron:

Dorothy-Morrison-Candles-Big-Order-April-17
Photo above is of my candle collection.
Dorothy-Morrison-Big-Order-Oils-and-Others-April-17
Photo above is of my oils chest. Included are Dorothy Morrison limited edition oils and other essential oils.

My old hoover started making sounds like it was going to explode and takeout half of the town with it. So I bought a new one:

new-hoover-April-17
My New Hoover bought on Amazon: VYTRONIX VTBC01 1400w Compact Cyclonic Bagless Cylinder Vacuum Cleaner HEPA Hoover

Around the same time I treated myself to three Yankee candles (large) and one Woodwick candle (large). I bought Midsummer’s Night, Turquoise Sky and Flowers in the Sun Yankee fragrances. Patchouli was the Woodwick fragrance.

My mum recently got a new sofa. She kindly gifted me her old sofa. It was really appreciated as my old sofas were knackered. To protect the leather from scratches by my cats, I bought throws and rubbed lemongrass essential oil on the sofa in places they would be tempted to scratch. Cats don’t like lemongrass essential oil or at least mine don’t. I also dug out some old cushions to match the throws.

Here are the results, a lovely sofa and chair, which are both like new:

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New sofa with brown throw and red & gold cushions.
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New sofa chair with red throw and red & gold cushion.

My birthday came and went without any real celebration. Lots of people gave me money, which I am going to save for when I go away for a night in June.

But for the May full moon I’d burned one of my Dorothy Morrison Hot Damn candles. I had a load of wax remains on my altar and then came up with an idea: What if I bought a Wax Melter and burned the remains? I saw this gorgeous Yankee Candle Wax Melter on ebay and couldn’t resist:

wax-melter
This gorgeous Yankee Candle Wax Melter was what I bought with some of the money I got for my birthday. The orange wax burning is the remains of a Dorothy Morrison Hot Damn candle (purchased from The Angry Cauldron).

A good friend of mine got married yesterday. I needed a suit for her Wedding and I picked up this stylish and absolutely bargain priced suit:

suit-for-wedding-from-ASDA
I bought this Charcoal Grey suit from ASDA for a bargain price of £50 (£35 for the jacket and £15 for the pants) for a friend’s Wedding. It looks exactly like a Next suit but was probably around one third of the price.

Candle Creation

In January I made a batch of homemade and handmade White Champagne & Strawberry candles. I couldn’t blog about them at the time because a number were reserved as gifts for people. I gave one to my mum for Mother’s Day, one to my Grandma for her 75th birthday, one to Simon and two to my friend for her Wedding. Here is a photo of one of my candles:

candle-creation-white-champagne-and-strawberry
My latest batch of handmade and homemade candles. They are White Champagne & Strawberry Candles in a 500ML mason jars.

I’ve completely run out of wax and fragrance. I’m hoping to do a batch of orange Pumpkin Spice candles and possibly repeat the red Hot Cinnamon candles.

Support

I’ve been accessing Bipolar UK’s eCommunity and attending my local Bipolar Support Group for the last few months.

The eCommunity is an active forum/message board where users (who can be people with bipolar or friends or relatives of someone with bipolar) can ask one another questions, share experiences and share helpful information. It’s free to use, open 24 hours and 7 days a week, and goes a long way to reduce isolation people with bipolar can experience.

I regularly check the forum and have posted there and replied to the posts of others. You can access Bipolar UK’s eCommunity here.

My local support group meets once a month. It took a lot for me to go along to a meeting, but I’m so glad I did. Nobody can understand bipolar or a mood disorder as much as someone who lives with it.

The facilitator and all participants of the group that I have met have been really friendly. I have found conversations there to be very useful and learned a lot just by listening and talking to others.

My group isn’t well attended and I think Community Mental Health Teams could do more to promote these local support groups (both in terms of posters/leaflets in waiting rooms and speaking to patients about them). These groups are free to access and go along way to reduce isolation. You can find your local Bipolar Support Group here.

Medication

venlafaxine-antidepressant-medication
I’ve recently started on Venlafaxine (antidepressant).

I’ve been in a depressive episode since at least last November. So I’m currently in the process of cross tapering, off Mirtazapine and on to Venlafaxine (NHS). So far the side effects of Venlafaxine have been quite severe. My side effects have included:

  • Dilated (large) pupils.
  • Daily headaches.
  • Being tired but wired.
  • Waves of nausea & dizziness.
  • Decreased appetite (not always a bad side effect).
  • Huge yawns.

Apparently Venlafaxine withdrawal is very severe. So I have two hopes for this medication. One that it improves my mood. Two that it is several years before my brain develops a tolerance and I have to be weaned off it and on to something else.

Blog soon,

Antony

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What’s Going On In My Head

Reading Time: 5 minutes

I’ve had a lot going on in my head recently, so much so that I decided to write my thoughts out as a mind map. The idea was to offload my thoughts on to the paper. I’ve written this blog post for the same reason. So this blog post is about me and mainly written for me.

Here is the mind map:

whats-going-on-in-my-head-April-2017
A mind map of thoughts to show what’s going on in my head.

As you can see I quickly ran out of room on the paper. So here’s the list of just some of the thoughts going on in my head:

My Brother after his recent spinal surgery – He is now in recovery. I am relieved that his surgery went well. But I worry that he’ll push himself too hard, as sometimes he thinks he’s indestructible.

My friend whose mum recently passed away – It was an expected death. His mum was 87 years old and had been in ill health for the last few months. She’d had a long and happy life and been in good health for most of her life. But it was still his mum. I have thought about my friend and his family often since I heard the news earlier this week.

How good my new Dorothy Morrison candles & oils smell – For several months I’ve been putting in small orders with The Angry Cauldron, ordering a few Dorothy Morrison candles and oils each month. A few weeks ago, I paid combined shipping and my orders arrived earlier on in the week:

Dorothy-Morrison-Candles-Big-Order-April-17
Photo above is of my candle collection.
Dorothy-Morrison-Big-Order-Oils-and-Others-April-17
Photo above is of my oils chest. Included are Dorothy Morrison limited edition oils and other essential oils.

Need eyes testing – I’ve not had an eye test by an Optician for a while. The Optician has sent two letters. Need to sort this out.

Vodafone letters wrongly stating I owe money – Vodafone have apparently sold a £100 debt of mine to another company. The problem is that I don’t owe Vodafone any money. I left Vodafone two years ago (in May) and everything was paid in full by Direct Debit. I have the bank statements to prove it.

The good time had at Grandma’s 57th Birthday meal – The family met up for my Grandma’s 75th birthday. We went for a meal in one of my favourite restaurants. I had a great time and have found myself frequently thinking of the family and the meal.

Week Off Work – I’ve got a week of annual leave coming up. I can’t wait. I’ve been thinking a lot about how to spend my time during that week off.

My friend’s Wedding in May – I’ve been thinking about what to wear, what to buy as gifts and what to take with me to the hotel (I’ve booked a 2 night stay in the hotel where the wedding is taking place).

What I’d do if I won the euromillions jackpot – The euromillions jackpot has been won quite a few times by UK winners this year. At the moment it keeps rolling over, making the jackpot prize bigger and bigger. So for the last few weeks I’ve been buying tickets and fantasising about what I’d do if I won the euromillions jackpot.

Electricity Final Bill – I misread my final electricity bill from SSE. I saw a credit on my account and not the debt balance that was in green. Easily done. But has meant that I have to find over £200 to pay the final bill.

I’ve left SSE via uSwitch for two reasons. Firstly because they didn’t take enough money by Direct Debt, so I was always in debt with them. I had repeatedly asked them to increase the Direct Debit, but they never did. The second reason was to save £50 per year.

Need to get rid of old sofa – My mum is kindly giving me her old sofa when she gets a new one. This is great because my sofa is on its last legs.

Man with a Van for new sofa – See above.

My Depressive Episode (December 2016 to now) – In December I started having some difficulties with my mood. I put it down to Christmas and being busy. My mood problems continued in January, with me noticing more symptoms. Again I put it down to busyness. In February I started talking to my GP about it. Fast forward to this week and my GP has referred me to my local Community Mental Health Team to review my medication.

The result of this depressive episode is that I’ve been working, eating, bathing, sleeping (terribly) and doing nothing else. Very little reading. Practically no creative output including no writing, no blog posts and even no thinking about them. Depression makes you feel empty, no ideas, no inspiration, no motivation, no energy and no drive.

I have been mediating more often, taking more time to relax and tried to do more of the things that I like.

mental-health-wisdom-banner

My car needs a clean – The inside of my car looks like a shanty town. This is one my signs and symptoms of depression.

Candle Making: Pumpkin Spice orange candles – I really want to make a batch of Pumpkin Spice scented orange candles for Samhain (Halloween). I have the perfect jars to put the candles in. But I need supplies and that means I need money. Despite not having the money or energy/motivation to make them now, I like to think about them. How good they would look. How good they would smell.

John Smith from The Dead Zone by Stephen King – I’ve been slowly reading The Dead Zone by Stephen King. It’s about a guy called John Smith who recovers from a coma and can see the future by touching people or things. What I can’t get over is the main character’s name. John Smith. The story makes clear from the outset that he is an average guy. So using such a common place name to represent that he’s an average guy is not required. It strikes me as lazy on King’s behalf. It’s a great story, but is let down by John Smith’s name.

new-hoover-April-17
My New Hoover bought on Amazon: VYTRONIX VTBC01 1400w Compact Cyclonic Bagless Cylinder Vacuum Cleaner HEPA Hoover

Microwave needs replacing – At home things generally break in threes.

First the hoover started making noises like it was about to explode and take out half of the apartment block with it, so I bought a new one (pictured left) for a bargain price on Amazon. If you’re looking for a new hoover, then this is the one. It’s compact and the suction is powerful. I’ve been really impressed with it and didn’t realise how bad the old hoover actually was.

Since then the mop has snapped and the microwave has stopped heating up food properly and is rusting. So I now need to buy a new mop and microwave.

Take care and blog soon,

Antony

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